Repairadigm

most of you are probably like what the heck is repairadigm. well, you are wondering because, you dont know. its a made up word. haha. i stole it from our campus pastor. well, i assume that most of you know what paradigm is? well, its okay if you dont, because i didnt know either. (i didnt even know the darn g was silent) so anyway, paradigm simply means "a pattern". on monday in chapel our pastor talked about patterns, and the patterns that people follow in our culture. something that he spoke about really got me to thinking. (imagine that?) he was talking about being "normal". our culture has messed me wayyy up when i think about what normal means. i have thought so many times that there really isnt normal anymore. but really, there is (or there was). the life that Jesus teaches us that we should have IS normal. and everything else is not. but because i have gotten so used to sin in the world, i have come to the point with some things that i just excuse the sin. i say..oh thats just "normal". well i have learned that it isnt normal! pastor kersey used the example of how we watch shows like the OC and Will and Grace and think that the way they act is just normal..so if they act like that..its okay..because that is just what the world has come to. but, what we need to do is take a step back and think about what normal really is. i need to not follow the pattern of the world. (repairadigm) get it? i dont know if anything i just said makes any since..but it was just such a challenging thing for me to hear. i am not one to say that i am a conformer in any way...im just normal. but am i the normal that the world calls normal? or the normal that God wants? something im chewing on these days....

2007.

man. i am coming to find out that the year 2007 is going to bring many, many things. great things and hard things...new things and old thing...
so, coming back to corban didnt start off too great for me. the first night i was back i was informed by a girl in my hall that she would not be returning to corban for the 2nd semester. i was devestated (spelling? haha). the reason this hit me so hard was because she was my closest girlfriend that i had made at corban. when i was sad i went to her. when i had a great day, i wanted to tell her about it. and when i was bored, she was always the girl i would go to. we talked about so many things, and i felt like i knew her so well, and she knew me. we had even made plans to possibly be roomies next year. when i found out that she wasnt going to be coming back THIS semester, i didnt know what to do. all sunday night, and even most of yesterday i was just in shock i guess. i didnt know what i was going to do without her. i hated walking to class without her, and coming back to the dorm and not going in her room to say hi.. and i didnt know why all of this was happening. my parents so kindly reminded me that God has a perfect and beautiful plan, but for some reason, i didnt thinking taking monica away from me was a good one. well, i was wrong. i dont know exactly what God's plan is in all this, but i do know that God does have a plan... and its wonderful. not having monica around has already allowed me to get closer to some other girls in my hall. God has shown me how important it is not to have my whole life planned out. this year is not going to be the way i planned or thought that i wanted. the amazing thing is, God knows what i want, and i believe with all my heart that if i seek after him, that he will give me what i want. even if i think its not what i want. and that makes me happy. :]

i commit this next year to not worrying about the future. not planning out my life. just giving it to God, and letting him do with me what he wants. and i commit to starting over new everyday.

Back at Corban. Woot.

well i am officially back at corban. and i didn't think i would be, but i am stoked! it has been so good to be back in my dorm room, and see my friends again- i didn't think i missed them so much. aha. tomorrow will be crazy. classes to fix, books to buy, friends to see, and i have work. :[ but i really am happy to be here. yayy. love to all.

I'm back. Get excited. ;]

[yes, things have been crazy, but I am back...and ready to blog. thanks for being patient.]

attention all "riverchasers"

this blog is for the riverchasers. specifically the youth of riverchase.

the other day, i was thinking about the term riverchasers and how much it bothered me when people referred to me in high school as a "riverchaser". when they included me in the riverchase clique (as they called it) it angered me. i remember thinking, "how stupid of them to acuse me of hanging out only with my church friends, when they are the biggest clique of all." what i was doing without even knowing it at the time, was judging. a theme i have noticed in my life, and in the life of many riverchase students...
i love being home. i really do. i enjoy being with my friends and hanging out with "the riverchase crew" so much. i have no problem spending time with them, because i care and love each one of them so much. i do have to say, though, that the youth group is not where i think it should be. or where i believe Jesus wants us to be. and i have a huge part in that. which i apologize for. lately, i have been thinking about praying about the youth group. i dont understand why we are where we are. some of you may be like, what is she talking about? our youth group is great. incorrect. we are most definetly not great. i know that losing our youth pastor and his wife wasnt easy but over the last year, we have lost more then that. we have lost many students, and friendships have even been ruined in our youth group. i believe that we (our youth group, and i am including myself in this) need to focus our attention completly away from us. focus on others. love them!! love is so important. before we can focus on loving others outside of the youthgroup though, we must focus on loving each other. i dont care what people in the group have done (cheated on their bf or gf, worn a ugly shirt, smoked weed, or posted a blog you didnt like)...STOP TALKING ABOUT IT! it doesnt matter!! what they do does not need to be talked about behind their back to the whole group. if it bothers you so much, then man up, and go talk to them face to face about it (humbly and kindly of course) then deal with it there, get it out of the way. then put it in the past. i encourage all of you to also mend old broken friendships. if there is someone that you were close to and you arent anymore then say your sorry. if you can sensirely say you are sorry to someone, and they dont forgive you, then i think that there is nothing else to do about it. you did the right thing. the next best thing to do, is pray about it. and if your waiting around for someone in the youth group to come say sorry to you and they continue not to, then you be the one to inatiate it. go to them first, they are probably waiting on you to do it anyway. someone has to do it.
once our youth group can stop focusing on ourselves, focus on others, and stop talking about others, then i think it would be a great time to then start focusing on the others outside of the normal group. i think bringing people into to youth group is the main reason for a youth group, but i think that our youth group must be "fixed" first in order for people to even be attracted to coming to our church. who would want to come to a church where people talk about one another? not me. what is it for them when we are just like their other non church going friends? nothing is it in for them. and they know it.
i hope that this has not come across wrong to anybody. i contstantly worry about if i am being "preachy" towards other people. i am not at all trying to say that i dont talk about people or that i dont judge. i do. i want to work on it. i need to work on. i want the youth group to work on it as well. lets help each other out. lets make a change! starting now. if someone starts to gossip, say kindly, "hey, let's not talk about that." if they give you a rude glare or whatever, dont worry about it. you did the right thing, and i can almost guarentee that next time you are around them they wont gossip again. try hard not to judge others. trust me, i know that sometimes we judge without even knowing it. sadly, i do it all the time. none of us can do this on our own. we need each other, and more importantly, we need Jesus' help. we should all be contstanly praying about it. i believe that with God's help and with all of us working together, 2007 can be an amazing year for the youth of riverchase.
I would like to end by post (if thats what you call it) with Jesus' prayer for all believers. this prayer is His prayer for us! i think it is so cool that Jesus prayed for us! i truly believe that he had the riverchase youth in mind when he prayed this prayer. and this is also my prayer for our church and youth group as well. i pray that we would be all these things, and i believe with all my heart, that we can be. i encourage all of you to read through this prayer and think about it. it has showed me many things about what God wants his believers to do and be..maybe ill talk about them in another blog later. :)

"My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they be one as we are one: I in them, and you in me. May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me. Father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am, and to see my glory, the glory you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world. Rightetous Father, though the world does not know you, I know you, and they know that you have sent me. I have made known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and I myself may be in them."
John 17:20-25 [NIV]